The Million Characters I Play

I've done a lot of thinking about how others view or perceive me. I think about all the characters I've played in others' lives. I'm a villain in some people's stories. Others might consider me a hero in their story. Sometimes I'm a side character. Sometimes I'm the character that leaves for a few seasons and then comes back later.

At the end of the day though we cannot really become entangled in these characters. I cannot control how others view me. Their ideas of me are shaped by their upbringing, beliefs, and emotions. Some see me as confident and others see me as bitchy. Some see me as emotional and others think I'm very in tune with myself. There is nothing I can do about how others perceive me. Realizing this and accepting it makes it so much easier to live life the way I want to: fully and confidently.

Spending all day wondering what each person that passes you in the halls or sees your Instagram post thinks about you will eat at you and drive you crazy. Life is too short to care about what others will think about every move you make. I think life is much better when you do what makes you happy even if it doesn't please others, or makes others jealous, or judgemental.

I am a strong believer that everything happens for a reason and the roles I have played in the past the universe cast me. I cannot control which parts I got in the past. I can try to be the villain less, but again we cannot control how others perceive us when we don't think we've done something wrong. Others may just believe that we are a villain due to their trauma, mentality, or upbringing. I also cannot control being a side character or a recurring character. Maybe I was the right person in someone's storyline for a few seasons and then wasn't anymore. The universe can always recast me but I cannot wait around and see if that will happen. I have other roles to play.

In your story, I may be the therapist friend. Or the person who saved you from a very dark place. I may be someone who put you into a dark place. Or someone you barely know but I made some small impact on your life. Maybe I was your best friend at some point. I've played many characters. For many people, I will forever be the same character in that chapter of your book or the scene in your movie. Some people will never get to know the new versions of me, as I grow up. I will forever be framed as the same person they once knew. And there are plenty of other characters we will all play. Releasing control of what character we are cast as is an important stepping stone to living life. If you truly want to live a fulfilling life you have to be yourself and stop caring about how others perceive you. Accept the hero and villain inside you. Accept the possibility of just being a side character or coming back to a storyline in a few seasons. Just make sure to put on a good show.