She's the It Girl

We have all heard of the infamous "It Girl" recently. The girl who dresses really well. Maybe she has that clean girl aesthetic. Maybe she hits the gym regularly (and looks good doing it). She has confidence. She has a routine. She is the goal we are all striving for. Here is my guide to becoming the It Girl:

1. Find a skincare routine that feels good and works for you. In the past six months I did a lot of research on skincare products and have finally created the perfect routine. For me what has helped me stick to this routine has been having a different morning and evening routine (which you should be doing anyways). This change in routine keeps me from getting bored and complacent enough to skip a day. It also helps to have a designated day of the week that you plan to do a face mask instead of your usual full routine.

2. Along with skincare you should find a clean makeup look. I do enjoy having a more dramatic look some nights but the "clean" makeup look makes me feel most comfortable. I have noticed the clean girl aesthetic makeup looks have less likelihood of becoming smudged or messy looking by the end of the night. It is also a much easier look to create if you are in a rush. Sometimes I add a fun little lip gloss or stain to add some more color to the look.

3. Find something active to function as your stress reliever. For me, going to the gym works. There is something very satisfying about finishing a workout and seeing results. Of course the results do not come right away. Results start to show after months of work, so try to focus on the stress relief aspect and the satisfaction of finishing a workout. You also do not have to go to the gym if that is not your thing. Maybe go for a walk or a hike. Recently I have gotten into pilates as well, and it is truly amazing!!

4. Create a playlist that has more feel-good music. I realized that when I used to solely listen to rap my mental health was not as good. Rap recently has become more about violence and degrading women. Constantly listening to that definitely did not build up my mental health or make me feel good. I have started to curate a playlist now of music that makes me happy and feel free. What you surround yourself with is what you become. Uplifting music will make you a happier person.

5. Along with surrounding yourself with positive vibes, you also need to eat well and speak good things into the universe. I stopped eating out as much and started cooking a bunch of recipes that were fun for me to make. Being able to complete a really good recipe felt like an accomplishment and it feels good to eat something tasty. When you make your own food you can also vet the ingredients you use. Using clean and healthy ingredients makes a huge difference in how you feel overall after eating. Just like consuming good food, you need to consume good thoughts and words. When you constantly think of or speak negative words out into the universe then you manifest those thoughts/words for yourself. It is the same concept as when you are running late for an event. It seems like every single light you come up on is red. You are so anxious thinking about how all the lights are red, that you're manifesting all your lights to turn red. When you start speaking positive affirmations into your life or reframing negative phrases, then you start to see the positive changes in your life. All of sudden one day you will wake up and notice everything is working out for you, and the things that used to upset you will only be minor inconveniences.

6. When it comes to how the It Girl dresses I like to think it has to do with having a strong capsule wardrobe. Having staple pieces that you can build off of is key to creating an It Girl outfit. Whether it is having a black mini skirt or white button up shirt, these pieces are essential to creating a simple but stylish look. From there you can add statement pieces to give it your own personal taste.

7. Lastly I'm going to talk about confidence. I still find it surprising that people request advice from me about confidence. In high school my friends thought I was confident, but I never even realized it. What I have always said and my best piece of advice for confidence is: "Confidence is all a facade". Confidence is made up. It goes hand in hand with the saying "Fake it till you make". Well the way I see it, just fake it till you are confident. Eventually if you put out this aura of confidence long enough that just becomes your personality and you are seen as confident. Another factor that helps is just realizing that nothing matters. No body else's opinion of you matters and if you block out this fear of what others think then it makes it 10X easier to build this facade. You start doing whatever you want for yourself and you feel good about yourself. Realizing that death is imminent and you cannot escape it also helps you realize that why not do whatever you want and feel confident while doing it? You start thinking of what others might think or say about you and say "Fuck you. I am hot. And I am my own advocate!" One thing that I noticed in high school was that when people were considered "popular" I did not always think they were attractive, but they had this overwhelming sense of confidence that made others think they were attractive. So even if you do not consider yourself to be hot enough to have this kind of confidence, you so totally can. It is the confidence that is attractive. People gravitate towards confident people, and once you feel this pull from others gravitating towards you it becomes almost addicting and your confidence is fed by it. You can do whatever you want!!! And act confident while doing it!!! Eventually you will feel like the facade is truly the best version of you and you will never want to put yourself back in a box again.

Honestly the most important tip from this list was the last one. Confidence is key to being the "It Girl". Once you're confident you can pull anything off. All the other points will just help you feel more confident, elevate you look, and make you feel better about yourself. Happy It Girling!!