Leaving to Find Yourself Can be Lonely

For some of us, our 20s are full of moments where we leave a place and its people behind. Maybe we leave the small hometown we grew up in for a bigger college town. Then we graduate college and some of us leave those towns for other experiences. I left after college to explore Europe. Before I settled into another city, I wanted to get back in touch with myself and who I wanted to become.

Somewhere along the line I got lost in the motions of school and relationships. I didn't take time to step away and really think about what I needed. Even going into this trip I didn't realize just how much self discovery I would do, or how much I needed it. My whole life all I did was go to school and push myself to make good grades. I never took time to recharge myself and do some internal work.

I had been running on low energy for so long that it changed my personality and perception of things. I had started to store this negative energy within me and it became poisonous.

So as soon as my energy started to revitalize on this trip I started to notice how my mentality shifted. I wanted to tune into my inner child. As a kid I had a magnetic energy to me. I always radiated positivity and happiness. At some point during my teenage years that changed. As soon as I began to tap back into that energy though I became hungry for more. So I started to work on myself daily. And it has been the most rewarding thing ever.

At the same time it has also been lonely. It is not easy to leave your friends and fly across the world. You feel the drift. Especially when you only talk to your friends here and there. And deciding to stay halfway across the world for a few months longer than intended is an especially difficult decision to make. But when it comes to healing yourself, growing, and becoming the version of yourself that you aspire to be, all of a sudden that decision becomes much easier. Leveling up is necessary and that is the era I'm in.

And once you start to level up and radiate that positive energy again, then thats when the universe makes life a little less lonely. The universe brings you new friends and connects you with old ones. As I started to feel like my true self again and I started to grow into a better version of myself, I started to see this shift happen. People I hadn't talked to in years reached out and we reconnected. I made new friends in different countries and even made a lifelong friend across the world.

You see, the universe knows exactly what you need and when you need it. But first the universe will test you until it knows you are ready. The past few years I kept failing the tests. I was miserable because I wanted things to change but wasn't willing to make the sacrifices needed to enact it. Finally, I made the change and have now put in the work. I continue to work everyday. But I'm happy to say that what I prayed for, dreamed of, and manifested these past few years is finally starting to come to pass.

I am so excited for this new journey. This new chapter in my life. If you've been feeling like you're stuck in a cycle of saddness and like you aren't moving forward, then this is your sign to figure out what the universe is testing you with and CHANGE. Trust me, you will be so much happier. At first it may be lonely. Growing is lonely. But it's worth it. And we can grow together<3